Friday, February 29, 2008

Still haven't found that THING that THING that I am looking for

Way back in 1987, when dinosaurs roamed the earth and leggings were in, I was a wee girl at the age of 10 when U2's Joshua Album came out. Even though I'm a huge U2 fangirl now, back then I really wasn't. My music sensibilities were more poppy -- Janet Jackson, Genesis and whatever else was on the Top 40 at that time.

Truth be told, I HATED With or Without You. I found it to be creepy, whiny and emotastic. The video didn't help with the whole Bono stalker image and Edge looking like a Pilgrim with a guitar. The four serious guys on the cover of the album were way too much of a downer for me. I didn't get it at the time. During that time, I wanted happier music with bouncy beats.

But then I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For hit the charts and well, it blew my little 11-year-old mind. I remember not exactly understanding everything in the song, but the chorus -- "I still haven't found what I'm looking for" -- after a long list of things the singer has found stuck with me.

Maybe it's because at 11, I knew that I didn't know or have it all. I knew that there was something out there bigger than me and my life that was waiting for me. There was something more than what was going on in the playground or among the cliques. I knew that it was wasn't something easily found like a new Transformer or My Little Pony (yes, I played with both, what of it?).

It also drove home the point to me that even in the materialistic 80's, there are some things that couldn't be bought. But I already knew that as a kid.

Maybe it's also because the video's kind of lighthearted in a bittersweet way -- chasing dreams in Vegas, the place most people think of when they're searching for something.

The most interesting thing about the song, looking back on it, is that Bono never names what that "thing" is that he's looking for (which lead to a hilarious parody from Negativland), which leaves it open to the listener.

So what was I looking for at the age of 11? Boys? Peace at home? Popularity? An Ocean Pacific shirt? I know it wasn't that. But what it was, I don't know, or it's lost to the mists of time. I still haven't found it. That thing, that thing that I am looking for.

And you know something, I hope I never find it. The search has kind of been entertaining.

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This has been in response to something posted at Her Bad Mother about music:

Feel free to join in (the topic is, 'OMG - The Smiths/NKOTB/Debbie Gibson/Insert Preferred Musical Act From Your Youth HERE - Like Totally Changed My Life OMG'). If you do write a post, be sure to link back and list the participants so that we can all find each other and not feel, like, totally self-conscious.
I'd like to pass it onto other bloggers, just to see what they say.

1 comment:

Her Bad Mother said...

I was an ambivalent U2 fan in my youth, too. But that song WAS special, for sure.

Thanks for joining in!