What I learned while on Holiday: Guilin

After a couple of days in Xi'an, we flew into Guilin on a rainy night. Frankly, the rain was quite welcome after battling the smog and dust of Xi'an. It was like how a good rain can make someone with hayfever feel much better. Guilin is known for its scenery. And now, it should also be known for its neon. Outside of the airport is a bunch of neon palm trees. For a second, I thought we landed in Vegas.

After dinner that night (which consisted of French fries. At a few meals, we got French fries and chicken tenders), Mom and I went to a massage place (not those kind you pervs!) to experience acupressure massage. For approximately $20 US, we got a 45 minute foot massage and 45 minute body massage. The people there were quite good and very nice. I had to tip my girl extra because she put up with my giggle fits because of how ticklish I am. After walking in Beijing and Xi'an, this was a welcome treat for many of us.

The funny thing is that once the employees knew that Mom spoke Chinese and I spoke a little bit (little bit = "I'm an American! I don't understand!" and "I'm hungry!"), they asked me to see if the other people were comfortable. Thanks to them, I now know the Chinese word for comfortable.

The next day was a cruise along the Lijang River. It's impossible to take a bad picture on that river -- well maybe, if I was spun around and hit on the head (but I doubt it). I'll let most of the pictures speak for themselves:







The reason for the stunning scenery is that the mountains are composed of limestone, a mineral that creates beautiful scenery, but is a bitch to farm. Not surprisingly, the ethnic minorities are given oodles of that land to farm and own. Sounds familiar huh? Because of this, Guilin is one of the poorest, least educated areas in China. That reminded me of Jamaica -- while the scenery is beautiful, you can't eat scenery.

You also couldn't eat lunch on the boat either. Our guide told us to "have a big breakfast," which was words I should've heeded. While I consider myself a pretty non-fussy eater, I didn't eat lunch there. Let me put it this way -- after seeing a chicken's foot (toenail and all) in the soup, I was done.

I know that chicken's feet are delicacies in China (hell Mom and Grandma love eating them when we're out for dim sum), but I couldn't do it. Not to mention, the rest of the meal didn't' look that appetizing. So I ate two pieces of deep fried eggplant and took more pictures. I mean, that was the point of the cruise, not the gourmet cuisine.

We also did some bargaining at the local markets. I managed to pick up a Mao watch for about $3 US and we also got books about Guilin for pretty cheap. On the boat, they were selling them for 100 Yuen, in the hotel it was 80 Yuen. In the market? We bargained them down to 35 Yuen by telling the owners that they had three solid sales right now and someone else offered 35 Yuen.

Admittedly, shopping for me was pretty damn hard in China. The clerks (in state-run and on the street) wouldn't leave you alone. Even the phrase "I'm just looking" (another random phrase I've picked up), doesn't mean anything to them. I had many dialogues like this:

Clerk: "Do you like it?"
Me: "I'm just looking."
Clerk (moving in closer -- violating the personal space rules): "How much do you want for it?"
Me: "If I want something I'll let you know."
Clerk: "That's a very nice choice."
Me: I'm. Just. Looking."
Clerk: "But if you want something else...."
Me: "I'M JUST LOOKING!!!!"

Anyways, we also saw a Cirque de Soleil-inspired show called Dreamlike Lijang. It combined the traditional acrobatics, dance and music into a very nice show that probably would've cost $180 per ticket in the United States. We paid $20 for second row seats.

To be honest, I wish I had more time in Guilin. There were caves that people could explore, if you were there for another day and I wish that I could've taken my masseuse home with me.